I’m often asked when to pull the plug on a failing relationship. When is there hope and when is it really over? Logic dictates that we should map out a course of action and prepare for (what may be) the inevitable. And though clients want me to give them this answer, they’re the only one’s who know when it’s really over for them. I recently got a letter from a woman who wants to save her marriage. She’s taken every step possible to correct the [...]
By Susan Winter for The Huffington Post The fear of being alone is terrifying for most people I know. We've been led to believe that having someone is better than having no one. This message runs deep in our social fabric and is the basis of many single's discontent. Attached to this myth is the belief that being single mean "unwanted" instead of taking one's time to choosing wisely. The fear of being alone is an irrational construct. Alone doesn't mean "lonely." Yet, many [...]
By Susan Winter for The Huffington Post Rare, but it does exist. I know a woman who has never had her heart broken. Something inside her insists upon her leaving the man she is with before any emotional damage can occur. I marvel at this. She doesn’t struggle with conflicting feelings. They simply evaporate. She’s not cold and shallow, as one might imagine. She’s open and loving. How does this happen? Most of us have had to experience a broken heart to restore us to [...]
By Susan Winter for The Huffington Post Breakup can have two distinctly different meanings. They can be exactly what they are, and they can also be the opposite of what they seem to be. A breakup can mean, “I’m done here. It’s really over.” Or, it can be a plea for proof of your love. This type of breakup comes as a threat, which is saying, “I love you. You’re hurting me. I want to stay with you but I feel scared, insecure and unappreciated. [...]
Lovers and friends come in and out of our lives. This is a natural occurrence. Yet, upon this revelation we often feel baldly. "Why did this happen? How could they let me down? I thought we shared a love, a connection, and that we were closer." Emotions of loss, betrayal, invalidation and sadness are common to the parting of ways. It takes thinking through this occurrence to get to a state of peace, power and purpose. If we're honest with ourselves, we find we're rarely [...]
